Episode 71 - Nothing but Being Wrong About Her

Mike runs his mouth about the girl he once swiped left on—only to end up dating her after a coworker’s girls’ night out, a spontaneous shift, and a whole string of wild coincidences. From misjudging her on Bumble to realizing the timing might’ve been divine, this one’s all about fate, dating apps, and why real-life connections still hit harder than a swipe ever could.

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Transcript

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When You're Finally Ready for Love

Mike 0:10

Alright , so you ever have the ultimate it'll happen when you're ready for it moment ? Because how many bad dates or poor excuses of relationships have we all had , screaming what the actual fuck was that ? Thinking that that person was the right one for you until it crashed and left you thinking that you were the problem ? But , weirdly , in my life things are seeming to look up , which is weird because , as of a few months ago , shit was not going according to plan . And how many times have I asked if I'm actually making the right choices and if this is the path that I'm meant to take ? But I'm gonna get into this story and you tell me if it doesn't answer the question of it'll happen when you're ready .

Mike 0:59

I don't know if Field of Dreams was just about building a baseball field for a bunch of ghosts now , because if you build it , they will come . . I'm also starting to think that was referring to the building blocks in your own life that will allow the right things to come into it . So I'm in training at the restaurant and this is now what ? Just about a month ago now ? And I wasn't even supposed to be on the floor that night I was just shadowing food service . The plan was get in , learn about the food, and bounce . But fate, or rather my coworker with a subtle matchmaking ambition , had other

Meeting at the Restaurant

Mike 1:34

plans . She worked and then said that she was going to come back in for a "girls' night with her friends because her friend isn't too sure about the guy that she's seeing and he's giving her mixed signals . And even though her friend and this guy had plans for the next day , her friend still wasn't too sure about the guy . So they went out to kind of , I guess , talk it out or whatever , and naturally I'm like cool , have fun , I'm out .

Mike 1:58

After training I got a ghost of a podcast that I got to record , plus also , let's be real , usually I want to say like what ? 60% of the time when "girl girls night , it's always the ugly friend who comes along . I doubted that I would be missing much , but I end up staying much later than I anticipated Because after my shift I was just kind of hanging out with my co-workers and right when I started thinking about dipping , my co-worker walks in with their friend and bro , I'm fucking floored . This chick had a gorgeous smile , bright eyes , total curveball . Was not expecting that and I'm sitting there like damn , maybe I will stick around , because I got a thing where I refuse to get involved with co-workers but I never said their friends were off limits , right , because this chick was just cute as hell . So we started talking and I asked her how she knows my co-worker , what she does , and she drops oh , I used to be a semi-pro rock climber , but that ended after I got injured . But I managed at a rock climbing gym . Once that closed , I started working at a cafe , which is where I am now"

Mike 3:12

And I'm like well , that explains the body , because , JESUS , I'm trying to be chill .. . b ut internally again I'm just like DAMN . So I started asking about her other interests and we go back and forth . We end up vibing so well that my co-worker even was like "all right , wow , now I feel like I'm the one who's third wheel in here and it's like , yeah , no offense , fucking go to the bathroom or something , because now you're not only guarding the view , but I'm actually interested in your friend . Now fuck that other dude that she has plans with . But I'm also not trying to be too pushy , because what if she's still interested in this guy that she already has plans with ? But that don't mean that she can't be at least thinking about me while she's out with this guy , right ?

Mike 3:59

So the next shift that I'm on with my co-worker , I'm like, "yo , how did your friend's date go the other night ? "And she's like yeah , no , she's definitely not interested . I'm like hell , no , she wasn . Did your friend's date go the other night ? And she's like yeah , no , she's def not interested ? I'm like hell , no , she wasn't , if I got the vibe on me right . So I'm like all right , well , how about you give her my number ? But she doesn't even have to , because who strolls in , not even like two hours later

The Dating App Near-Miss

Mike 4:20

for her friend from the other night ? And you know what she does ? She leaves a receipt with her number on it before she leaves , with a note that says give to Mike . And you know what ? Yeah , she should .

Mike 4:31

I can't help the fact that I'm just adorable , but I will be honest . Bro , I haven't chased anything that fast since the last time I did a bad tequila shot . I haven't drank in two years now almost , but I still remember how Cuervo goes down and it ain't great . Fucking shuddering after that shot like you do when you hear a bad ex's name like , ugh . But then we start texting . Texting turns into calls , calls turn into dates and I'm starting to realize like , wow , I'm actually super into this chick . But also how sneaky my co-worker was , because when my co-worker's friend told her that she was on the fence with this guy that she had her plans with , she was like you know what ? You should come in to meet the new guy the restaurant hired- yours truly- because I think you guys would hit it off . And hell the fuck , yeah , we did . But here's where it gets wild .

Mike 5:30

It turns out as of this past week , I discovered that we almost matched on Bumble two years ago and you guys are all probably thinking how the hell do you almost match on Bumble ? You either match or you don't match . Somebody didn't swipe right . Don't get ahead of me . Because she told me that she actually remembers seeing me on Bumble and swiped right . And I'm like what ? So she showed me some of her photos that she used on her dating profile . I'm like , oh shit , I actually swiped left , but in my defense back then she had purple hair .

Mike 6:10

I saw the , she , they in the bio and the distance was low-key , kind of far , because she lives closer to the restaurant that I work at and I made assumptions . As cute as she was , I was thinking leftist , liberal , we're gonna clash . I was like , yeah , like she probably hates gas cars , has crystals in her bra and would 1,000% ask me what time I was born, and I wasn't just gonna date somebody that I knew we would freaking clash right off the bat . And I'm gonna own it . I totally admit that I was wrong . It turns out that she just put the they on there because she was managing a male-dominated rock climbing gym and she wanted women and non-binary folks to feel welcome . It wasn't about the whole gender ideology or politics at all . She doesn't even give a damn about politics . It wasn't her entire personality , it was just something that she did for others . She's actually one of the most grounded , level-headed people I've ever met . So now I'm thinking well , I was kind of an asshole for making that assumption .

Mike 7:16

But this also highlights another issue with dating apps . I feel like they often reduce people to a few photos and a brief bio , leading us to make snap judgments based on limited information . These fucking platforms encourage quick decisions which can cause us to overlook potential connections with people who might not look "our types" from a quick glance . These apps reduce complex individuals to a few photos

The Problem with Dating Apps

Mike 7:45

and a brief bio , leading us to make snap judgments based on limited information . It's so easy to forget that behind each profile is a real person with depth and nuance that a swipe can't capture . So yeah , did I learn the lesson that you can't really judge a book by its cover 100% ? But does this also , low-key , prove that it's better to meet someone in an organic sense than over a fucking screen 1000% ? So you know what ? Fuck dating apps and thank God for bars and restaurants If you just got the balls to have a conversation with someone . Fuck dating apps and thank God for bars and restaurants If you just got the balls to have a conversation with someone . You think Gen X or generations before met people through apps . No , they met through friends , coworkers or at social places like bars . As a society , we have become so immersed with hiding behind a fucking screen that you can't even say hi to someone in a bar . But yet you'll go on platforms like gaming services or Omegle and talk to strangers . But , god forbid , an actual human being is in front of you and it's like you forget how to human . Oh , and the kicker .

Mike 9:08

We worked in Stamford at the same time . That's why she ended up swiping right on me , because she was working in the same area as me and she saw my profile .

The Surprising Connection

Mike 9:16

The last company that laid me off was a three-minute walk to a place that I used to go and get coffee at every day , and at that coffee shop some of those people also worked at the gym that she managed and her co-worker remembered me because I always tipped well . I mean , I was going to that coffee shop like every day . One , because the coffee was good , two , because it got me out of an office that I absolutely couldn't stand being in . And three , I also got to become kind of friendly with some of the people working there and I was apparently known as the good tip guy and after this dude's shift at the coffee place that I would go to , he would then run over to the gym to go work there and mentioned that there wdas this dude named Mike who always came in and tips really well , because at that that time I was also bartending on the side . So I knew how much a tip meant and I think it's kind of also a thing where people in service try to help out other people in service .

Mike 10:13

So , also unbeknownst to me . I had already made a great impression on this chick well before I even met her . But the girl who I'm now dating's gym that she managed from where I worked , was like 10 minutes away from each other . So it was just weird how there are all these little coincidences and distance approximations where we never actually ended up meeting until my first week at the restaurant . And she actually told me the other day you know , if you just swiped right two years ago , it would have saved me so much heartache after all the crazy dudes that I've dated like I was actually locked in from when you said hello and I told her I'm like well , you know what , maybe we weren't supposed to meet yet . Maybe we needed to deal with our own dumb asses first , because , given where I was at the time and how I was feeling after all my bad dating app dates or poor excuses of relationships over the years , I was also still working out my own bullshit and trying to figure out what I wanted when it came to a relationship . So , yeah , maybe I wasn't supposed to swipe right two years ago . Maybe she had to deal with her own mess and I also had to try to clean up mine . And maybe God looked at both of us and said Nah , not yet . You two aren't really done with your dumbass era .

Mike 11:37

But now I got a new job the same week that I met her . I wasn't even supposed to be working that night . My coworker just happened to bring her in . All these little weird overlaps, Stamford where I worked , the coffee shop , mutual connections . They didn't hit back then , but they do now . And now I'm just glad that she walked into that bar and I didn't end up swiping away and was smart enough to actually say hello .

Mike 12:11

And that's the thing about divine timing . God listens . He just doesn't always work on your clock . You pray and you want the answer by Tuesday , but God's like , bro , Tuesday ?

Divine Timing and Life Lessons

Mike 12:17

You're not even ready . You'll fumble this so fast it's not even funny . So he holds off . And when he does move , when he starts putting people or places in your path , that's when you realize it wasn't silence , it was a setup , because sometimes the answer to your prayers walk in when you weren't even supposed to be working .

Mike 12:39

Sorry , maybe this one was more of a real talk than punchlines , but if you're still here , then maybe you get it . Sometimes this show is about jokes . Sometimes it's just me trying to make sense of the mess . Either way , I appreciate you for being along for the ride . If this episode hit you or you've got your own , we almost didn't meet but the universe said , nah , it's time story . Shoot me a message at lnbemedia@ gmail . com , or drop a comment . Seriously , comments boost the show way more than people realize , even if it's just a thought , a fire emoji or just Mike's kind of unwell , but we like him anyway . Yeah , still , fuck you , Kevin . You think I forgot about you , but hey , you know what ? I can't really be mad because it still kind of helps . So also thank you , Kevin . But yeah , share the episode , follow the pod on instagram and tiktok @theln be podcast and leave a review if you've got time . With that , I hope you all have a fantastic week and we'll catch up next time .